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and it’s Being fun and helping others have fun is a way of keeping dates and potential relationship partners engaged and invested in the relationship.It’s a vital part of the chemistry that helps ensure that not only will she enjoy the first date but that she’ll be interested in coming back for a second… The worst dates date just drains the life out of everyone involved.
The better they make us feel, the more we like them.
Fun people are interesting – they tend to have diverse interests that they enjoy and have stories to share.
This isn’t to say that it’s just a matter of telling a few jokes until you manage to laugh them into bed. Once I understood the appeal of fun, I began to recognize how it formed the underpinnings of everything I’d learned up to that point – and how much I had seen it in action over the years.
Because of the pervasive belief that sperm is cheap and eggs are expensive – the idea that women grant sexual access only to those who offer the best “value” – they tend to focus on the most obvious aspects of what supposedly makes men attractive: looks and material wealth, with “status” following third.
The problem is that they’re working on the wrong areas and a misunderstanding of just what makes somebody appealing to women. more often than not it’s not even in the top 5 of what makes a man attractive.
More than looks, more than money, more than whatever nebulous definition you want to give to “value” or “status”, the most attractive aspect of a man, that x-factor that nets him attention, attraction and dates is… Over the years as I was trying to make my transition from “dateless loser” to “ladies man”, I got to know a wide variety of folks who were good with women.